I HAVE to shift back to kirksman87.blogspot.com
Recently I’ve been trying to edit this wordpress template, and I was wondering what the hell la….keep on cannot edit one. Then I found out I have to pay…………..before i can edit my template. Which is kinda skrued up………
so back to blogspot.com
damn, blogspot never dies man!. The worst part is there’s no kalers……colour takda, wa cialat la.
I think the Malaccan (I’m only using capital letters for Malacca because I respect my birthplace, not the bastard governments that run it) government has recently colluded with Perodua bastards to install a certain “I didn’t put my ticket detector“.
They bloody summon my bloody MYVI’s tight ass!!!! URgh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They gave me a RM30 summon for parking without putting a ticket. Problem is, I WAS BUYING THE GODAMNNED TICKET!!!!
Fuckers you know these idiots all. They’re hopeless for anything else this Malaccan government.
1. They can’t build proper roads. Look how fucked up our roads are all over. There isn’t ONE road in Malacca that’s good.
2. Half the money they collect goes into the direct pockets of these ministers without a proxy. Just slides right in their pockets and they buy their children Mini Cooper Limited Edition, S 210BHP versions.
3. The minister’s crib and the king of malacca’s crib is big like a Ja-Rule shed yet they do basically nothing to contribute to the state. Please la godamn it, I’ve been seeing rempits all weekend, where got do anything against them? However, an uncle ride his bike pass by roadblock also they saman, say his lights not working.
Now guess what? They summoned a poor innocent student that was trying to be a law abiding citizen that went to buy a ticket to put on his car. Why can’t these bastards just use back the old system of coins to pay? I know………..you know why? Because chances of people forgetting to put the tickets because they’re so troublesome is much higher with this system, so they can summon more people. Then these bastards can get more revenue which they’ll state as profits to the government and say that they’ll fix things like fallen lamposts, restore old buildings (yeahhhhhhhh right!!!!!!!!!), more construction and development and repair roads (i hate the roadS)
But fuck them, we all know the truth don’t we?
+ 
=Happy Govt
LOOK WHAT THEY DAREEEEEEEEEED GIVE ME!
Oh why these bastards!!
THen………when I went to pay the fuckined summon, they fuckers, didn’t open the godamnned bootH!
SEE LOCKED!
CLOSE MAN!
Look……this is their opening hours wor….looking at the amount of heat, that I was exposing my delicate skin to the UV rays that could kill my precious cells…..it’s definitely about 3pM….OOOH!!!! *SWOONS!*
So this is what I did……..dare they summon me again?I’ll kill them
HMPH!!!!!!!!!!!
Beat that mofos!
The best part, was when I was about to get into my car….i saw that fucker stopping his bike there to saman my car again! I shouted straight into his face man, told him to see the amount of tickets I’ve already put. I’ll kill him if he dares summon me.
What are our rights as citizens of this country? How’d we know that we’re not being cheated, say if we put our tickets there and they still summon us, how can we tell? How can we speak to the relevant authorities to remove the compound and that we’ve actually put the tickets there?
100+ is an isotonic drink. In case you don’t know what isotonic drinks are, they’re drinks that refresh you and rehydrate your body. Gives it that little energy after a tiring workout or sports session.
Obviously, like many other drinks…think 100+ is crap.
Thus my theory is drink orange or grape juice. Let’s see their contents. It contains, fiber, vitamins, phytonutrients and even minerals. Juice is good with protein because it spikes your insulin and helps recovery. So eat those carbs ladies. Don’t assume carbs are all bad! They’re not. MCD’s are bad! Awful.
Anyway enough bollocks, here’s why i think 100+ marketeers are morons. PLain MOROOOOOONSS!
See this bottle? IT has no label. We don’t know who marketed this bottle right? Now why’s that so?
Because the sor hai marketeers,designed the bottle this way. So you see, if we hold the top, the label slips RIGHT off. SLIP! No more free advertising for 100+
However, look at this bottle
La Boost. Wtf that means I don’t know. I don’t care either. Who advertises mineral water anyway?
But smart thing, they made the thing very easy to hold with those user friendly bumps all over. Thus this enables them to keep the label solidly on unless one plucks them off.
See? Circular design, no stupid cone shaped tapers that slide off.
Conclusion? Left bottle marketeer, traditional, smart.
Right side, unconventional, new, …..stupid.
It’s hella hard to hold the godamnned bottle!!! It keeps slipping. THus I removed the label and life has been less complicated.
Sorhai 100+. Now I don’t buy 100+ anymore. I either buy Ribena or orange juice, or I buy gatorade. Gatorade’s cool, cuz the name’s cooler and it’s worldwidely known.
A close friend of mine even added this : “must b some other company join them..then working undercover
to sabo 100+. everytime label come off….then no more advert d”
You knew this topic was gonna come someday. I love tattoos.
Let me repeat myself, I LOVE TATTOOS.
Yes the same things that the tribal people of eastern Malaysia have. The same thing that people associate with to drugs, hippies, gangsters and all the nonsensical hoo hah. I mean, I can’t blame the stigma these people attribute towards tattoos. If you reside between the bushes and drink from a bowl made out of coconut, it’s no surprise at all you hold such a negative mindset towards tattoos.
You probably must still think that bikers with big tattoos are bad people who do nothing but stop at bars and drink and fight?
You’re probably those that hold this beautiful belief that, a body clean of all modifications, is a beautiful body?
You must believe that a clean spick and span adult, should be void of all forms of ink and piercings from his body?
Well, here’s my rebuttal to those ancient yet unfounded beliefs.
If one is yet to notice, bikers have a strong belief in brotherhood. Bikers, are hardly bad people. Some of these people, are under the constant pressure of work and the expectations of society and the conforming of the norms. These may be professionals that take the weekend and enjoy it by riding into the open roads, while relaxing and totally appreciating what life holds for them. They work tremendously hard weekdays and they play harder during the weekends. They take that the deep throathy rumble of the 1200CC Harley’s are as euphoric as sex.
Bikers, are not even necessarily bad people. That purported belief is very much unfair.
On this RIDICULOUS belief that the body is beautiful, when left the way it is, I will state a few analogies that I hope can spank a little sense in the minds of the closed and see world in a manner, more interesting than the black and white.
In the purest form of a being, on the day the sperm reaches the ovum and develops, changes begin. When the baby is born, changes continue. The baby increase in size and gets longer, when he or she stands, they will then grow taller. As they grow on, their mind changes, their brain changes, the body changes. Everything in the body, whether physical or mental, change.
Now let me question this. Which part of the body is left in the original state it first came out as?
Women, pronounced for dieting and weightloss and complaining about their shape. Is this not a desire for change? Exercise and things like that, in the painful quest of obtaining the ideal physique. Is that not change?
Men, in their egoistical quest to be the strongest. Is that not change to the body? Molding the perfect herculean physique. That states changes, in a form crystal clear that nobody can misinterpret.
Science has it that we can even change our faces, our bodies via plastic surgery and implants. In the eyes of another man, it may be as ugly as the camel toe of Beyonce, yet another may find it mindblowingly gorgeous.
Thus what right does one hold to judge the perception of others on beauty?
My definition of beauty, is carving a physique of 205 pounds with the capability to squat 700 pounds on the back. To lift a woman, with one hand over his head and slip her into his confident arms and keep her safe through the night. Yet, Dave Navvaro might disagree to the south’s end. I care? You’ve got to be kidding.
Thus you fuckers who hold this idiotic stigma of people with tattoos as worthless scumbags, have better take a mirror and stare into the eyes of the man or woman that supplemented that thought. Everybody’s right in one way, everybody deserves some respect and I demand the tattooed community to be equally respected as the man that stands on the top of the ladder of success of Axxon Mobile!
I see no reason why one man must be less respected than the other just because he choose a different route. I demand bastards that discriminate a perfectly capable man out of a job, to accommodate another fresh graduate just because the fresh graduate is of a different skin color, be dammed to the gallows. WEll maybe that’s a little too much, but yeah you get my flow……
I want this bullshit on tattoed individuals to be thrown out. A tattooed man or woman, deserves the same right that that other lady who voted for Bush the asshole.
I WILL TATTOO MYSELF despite what you jackasses think of me if I have one.
Soon………soon……….but now i have a problem lah……i can’t seem to decide if I wanna tattoo my back first, or my legs first……………..alamak, fidgety minds, fidgety minds.
All this time, my holidays were mainly of unproductive time wastage, camps, sleeping (excessively) and a itsy bitsy bit of studying. This time, however, I’ve made a plan to systematically spend my time, in a manner that will produce favorable results for myself. I won’t live my life for my friends this time, it’s time I concentrate on what’s good for me, and going out till late at night isn’t one of the many. Fetching my friends back and forth while they ignore me completely or isolate me like I’m a scum breed shan’t be one of them. Science is right, live for yourself. University’s an interesting place.
You’re supposed to have the time of your life in university. Enjoying it with friends, blowing your serebums into pieces plastered all over the library window with last minute cramming, for the girls, the girl talks and sleepovers and cafe nights, for the guys, sports and games, chilling in the pubs and laughing about things guys talk about, playing pool and talking about cars and computer gadgetry. The girls will enjoy their time out once a month, shopping and while their boyfriends tag along wondering when the next set of lunch time will be.
That was how I pictured, university to be made of. How grossly wrong I was. I was probably at the south end of the truth of this statement. Perhaps it is my fingers which crossed the checkbox on “contentious” yet I must argue that it wasn’t so in the first year of my life in university. I had a wonderful friend, I loved tremendously. Perchance, it was her wacky yet indescribably lovable self that kept my laughing and entertained all the time. Good times.
Then I had a group of friends. Nothing like the ordinary let me first assure you. There were ones that’d scream at the sight of a headless cockroach, there were ones that’d laugh at that sight. There were ones that’d cuddle a dog in her arms, moochey coochey’ing the dog till it disgusted even the poor dog itself, and there were idiots like me who stood somewhere in between everywhere. Also, it’s thanks to these people that I’ve developed a ceiling dislike, hate, despise, REVULSION for noises. Tiny noises, I hate them like no end. Even now, when I’m driving my “drunken potato” (Read:MYVI), the slightest twink or tremor on the dashboard will irk my to the realms of darkened potato anus with some growth infection in them. I HATE them so badly. That’s why I threw out all the fans in my compute and left one big on. Ah silence. Sounds good.
Right……enough jeremy clarkson……This is what I have planned for the entire holidays. Note I’m actually just typing this out while I’m thinking of it.
- Settle assessment bills
- Settle summons (Just parking tics, I’m the main contributor of summons for fucking corrupted malacca cocksuck gov)
- Gym’s on Mon, Wed, Fri. (Ah fcking nirvana……)
- Give tuition on Saturday mornings and Mon, Tuesday nights.
- Read 20 wikipedia articles, daily, about any topic to increase my general knowledge and prove myself a smart ass in parties and shake my wussy ass praying I might get lucky with some 36-24-36 blonde bombshell. She’s gotta be above 35 in age though.
- Finish all my long as fuck motivational, self help (despite how pitiful it may sound, it frankly isn’t) and story books
- Watch all those morbidly sadistic movies about Hitler’s mass murder of 30 million people, racism and hypocrisy in America and plan how to make my own movie that portrays the indecency of malaysian government and their ruthless plan to siphon all money into their canvas pockets aka sammy fucking vello bastard son of a broken cock.
- Gain…..let’s see I shall bulk with 2.2LBS 2 weeks….so yea I hope i’ll gain about 2KG’s in this month.
- Figure a way to break Beyonce’s mask and reveal the true her. A man. If I launch a catapult, with a target weight of 8lbs, and launch it at 48 degrees, 48’42 with a speed of about 82347234 billion km/second, I might be able to hit “shim” in the nose while shim’s in the bathroom removing the fake suit. However, i risk hitting my grandmother’s grave if it falls short. Thus it won’t work.
bah………
*Listening to DMX – What these bitches want from a nigga* – Stupid song sounds like a R&B and hip-hop fusion.
Yeah, I’m saying that. Chinese guys can NOT drink at all. My goodness, I’ve been to so many weddings, I’ve seen so many people in weddings that get hella drunk till they can’t even walk down the stairs without breaking their nose stumbling on the concrete steps. I’ve seen them fight and shout in weddings. I’d rank this as the platinum card of disrespect. Hello? People’s wedding, you fight? What kinda retard does that?
This was again proven yesterday at my buddy’s birthday. Again cannot drink. They were talking about drinking a whole bottle of liquor alone, about 4-5 packs later……….plet~ort…..(u can’t pronounce that lest ur kirksman) Start getting high and making noise about everything. My cousin and I were kinda surprised. Okay, that wasn’t even with the bottle yet. The worst part is, they started fighting after a few drinks. Play game also gadoh? Aiyoyooooooo….!! We seemed as if we drank like a tonne of drinks, but we drank only half a bottle!!! I remember drinking with Josh and R****, 1 whole bottle on ourselves, in about 3 hours. Then we started laughing like mad at R**** cuz he was totally drunk. 
Now I know why the machas say chinese can’t drink. Well, might help that I’m mixed up. Can you believe it, someone actually thought my dad was Serani? Puheeeleezeee……we don’t look THAT dark!
Sungguh the not cool. Couldn’t get much sleep also, don’t know why I’m already awake at 8.30AM while I slept at 4AM. Sick….
ah fck la, i didn’t burn my bulu kaki. damn
Why the hell’s TMNET so fucked up? Seriously….I’ve never actually read or used or seen a company more messed than TMNET Telekom. Okay, Proton’s an exception, IT’s fucked up beyond words thanks to the government protectionism. Hell that company shouldn’t been started up anyway. It’s created by a champion, run by losers and fucked like bunnies.
I’m so annoyed by Streamyx lines crashing down like the stocks of Pro’fucking’ton all day long. I’m broke, my exams are over, I’m supposed to have fun and thanks to TMNET, they screw up my holidays. I’m not broke exactly, but I ain’t hoping to be spending all day long out. The weather’s too bloody hot and I’m too lazy. The only reasons I’m going to bother moving my arse outta here would probably be because;
1. I’ve got training to do.
2. My friend calls me out to lunch and promises me a good ass wiping while we’re at it.
3. I’ve gotta send and fetch my brother who can’t even take a fucking bus thanks to the fact his asshole brother’s got a license and a car already.
4. I’ve gotta buy food.
I hate TMNET. I hate Telekom. I’m studying in a university owned by Telekom. Joy. It’s always what people say, “If you want something, you won’t get it, when you don’t care about it, it comes to you” Right now I don’t care. I just want one simple thing. That is just, gimme my fucking degree and let me get the fuck outta this godforsaken place. I’M INSANELY PISSED with my lack of internet despite my lax portrayal. *Shoots self* This bloomin keyboard isn’t helping much either. With it’s keys …roughness…hardness…..what term should I use…difficult to press’ness (Good lord, the geeks never came for up with a word for “Difficult to press keyboard keys”?) I thus have a stupid tendency to hit the “Shift” key with extra pressure and end up having more than one word with capitals. Like this. “SCCCrewwww you!”
Ah fck………I’ll just write about my
“How I learnt about smoking” history.
I think I was about 8. In my grandparents home, I had always seen my grandparents smoking wondering what’s that they were doing. So one of those days, they were having prayers. When we have prayers, we always put some offerings and things like that. Tea, water, wine, liquor, chicken, pork, cigarettes. They would usually burn the cigarettes and let it just burn off. I remember it would always be a gold colored cigarette pack. I think it’s Benson & Hedges.
After prayers, the adults went out to get some things done I think. I got frisky and started fooling about with the dimwit lighter. The lighter was always one of my curious fascinations. Always wondering, how does that thing make a flame?
I tried and tried, and eventually after about 4328 times and another 3282 times I burnt my fingers, I finally got it to light. It was awesome! The flame lit. Okay, now what? I took a cigarette that was left on the table and lighted it up. It took forever to light up. It wouldn’t even burn! I was wondering, how did my grandparents burn it so quickly? I took like what? 5 seconds to get it to light?
I held it pretending I knew all about smoking and showed off to the god statues. Then I heard my parents coming in and I threw it out the window. Case closed.
Then I think when I was 14, my grandparents came over to our place to stay over. I took one cigarette stick and burnt it and figured “OH!! You’ve to suck it in for it to light??” There was this strange taste in my mouth and I just coughed it out. I was absolutely fascinated by the smoke coming out the cigarette stick. I kept sucking it up and just blowing it out and trying to pretend it was clouds or something.
And everything else was history.
However, strangely, I was never addicted to it. I mean, seriously…..I’ve never even gotten it a craving for it. It never mattered to me actually, until I entered university and smoking became more common. I’d smoke when I was stressed or bored. Usually, I could just go around a few months without it. No big deal. Then came clubbing. I didn’t dance, so I’d just drink and smoke the whole night. Few months down the road, I checked my stamina, it dropped drastically. I used to run 10 kilometers in approximately 40 minutes. No big feat but hell…..
Now…even 2 kilometers seems to be a mountain task to me. I could still lift weights, no big deal there, but I couldn’t seem to run. My stamina decreased drastically and my fitness level dropped. Wham! Just like that.
There was a period of about 4 months that I didn’t touch it at all. OH yeah, my stamina increased like a monster and so did my metabolism. I ran nearly 8 kilometers in 30 minutes after that, wasn’t back to my old record but it was good. It was thanks to one of my friends from Thailand, making a promise with me. She’d send me her DVD’s of her acting (Stop the porno thoughts, it isn’t. I’m not even joking) and I would never touch a cigarette again. Hell forever was 4 months. There wasn’t craving la to be frank. It was just the people I hung out with. If the bunch don’t smoke, no problem…..I wouldn’t be smoking. If the bunch smoked, then uhoh….
Thus I’ve decided to just quit. No more smoking. I never really started smoking like a chain smoker, but yeah, my friends got, I’ll grab a stick. Yesterday was the first day off it completely. I just watched my friend smoke with no intention of smoking. There wasn’t even an urge actually. Just a habit I feel. I feel smoking is really overcome able if one can fight one’s habit. It isn’t about addiction, it’s just plain habit. At least for me it is.
Thus, no to smoking. But yes to crack!! Crack is good stuff. Makes me happy. Then again, I get sugar high very quickly from coca cola (even diet cola……weird…..) and chocolates. So I guess I’ll just remit cigarettes and go with healthy yet sinful treats such as wonderful chocolates!! Max Brenner anyone? Liying? Plis………chocolatesssss…… I promise I won’t bully you for a whole week if you come back with some of his chocolates. The bald man. =D
This is what I intend to do. I shall have dinner with my friends, then buy a bottle of thinner and blow myself (Okay, fine just the feet….)up in fire.
I will attempt to hold the fire for approximately 3 seconds before I try to put it out.
WHY?
Because my leg hair’s too long!!!
I need to shorten it. SO I’ll just burn it.
I’ve always had a fascination with fire. It never ended. People have peculiar fetishes, some like sniffing books, some love smelling their own poo, some people like to watch ladies walk, some men like to watch men’s asses. I love fire. How much more strange and sick can I be compared to these other people? I believe there is no and should NOT have a gauge. I’ve always been slightly on the eccentric and bizarre side, but no worries there.
The night shall begin on the 25th May 2007.
I shall be attending a birthday dinner of a friend.
Then outta courtesy, I’ll bring a bottle of JD’s for them. I doubt they’ll finish it anyway. Then I’ll get some of it flowing in my bloody so that it’ll nullify the pain….. I doubt it’ll stop the pain but it’s worth a try anyway.
Then for the post dinner lepak time, I’ll stand up, grab the thinner from my car and pour some on my shoes.
Then I’ll get a picture of it before the fire, and after the fire. And get a friend to record while I’m at it.
I hope my leg will be as smooth as Scarlett Johansen’s leg after it’s done.
Ignore the dustbin please. Fuck that leg’s a lil too vicarious for me. Let’s go with somthing a lil more subtle.
Mother……..and if I’m feelin good, I’ll burn my abs too. Get a lil tan down there. No not DOWN there fuckface.
Yea screw school man!!!!!!!! WOHOOOOOOO!! I’m burning myself!!! Get all they hairs gone.
woohooo hoo!! Mou Chong kong ching chong chang ching!!!!! Mofuaker!!! Taycheeeeee!!!!!!!!
This is the literal sense of “Burn me baby, burn me desire with your fire~!”
uh-huK!
First, you get a spoon of protein shake, HL milk, and ………an egg! The magic ingredient!!
I didn’t know it’ taste like that
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvMCrrmj3QI
and for some reason, my sohai video can’t seem to upload!! URgh!!! This is annoying me! Bleh!
Don’t know la, don’t care la. Let it upload. Can, can, kenot …..lantak!
Then when u have a solid dose of nearly 24+6+15=45GMS of protein runnin in your blood to heal those muscles, you camwhore.
KooKO~
Cupcake?
BIG cupcake!
SMall cupcake?
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 | kirksman on Tattoos. |
